my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
