last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
the raccoons are back...
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