you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
