I am in a vortex of obligation.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
