do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Randomize
