I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I wish I only lived at night.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
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