do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Randomize
