I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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