You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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