What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
