he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
