So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize