Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
