hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
