Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
