Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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