birth control should be required to get into college
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
