she looked like the bat from fern gully.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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