The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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