I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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