READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize
