I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
