im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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