I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
