i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I'm both gender and math confused
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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