her vagine was all disorganized.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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