So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
