All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
