I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
So vagazzling was a success
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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