Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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