Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
