Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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