We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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