theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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