why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
