I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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