i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
