scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
