Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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