There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
