Ambien. No doubt about it.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
