another moral hangover. fuck.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
