What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
