If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
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