She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
