Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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