I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
A+ Viking dick
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
