He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
