I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
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