even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I still have a little drunk in my system
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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