WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
When did angry sex become our thing?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
